In My Humble Opinion, March 12, 2012

Today I venture into the blogging realm where I don't find myself with a great deal of experience.
 I would think that as a technology prowess, I would be loving the blogosphere.  Alas, I don't!  There's a first time for everything.  


It's March 12, 2012 and on Spring Break.  For two weeks.  Not one, but two.  How did I manage that? I took another week off (vacation) after this week.  I am pleased and need the weeks off.  


My feelings?  Right now I'm a bit put out with myself.  I bought some new perfume that's not even at Sephora, Macy's or any other place.  It's at Nordstroms and I love being there.  Whenever I go in, I feel like I belong there even though I don't really buy anything.  Today was different.  I spent $108, no, that's a lie, $116 for perfume.  I've never bought something so incredibly vain in my life as I did today.  BUT! I spend lots of money everyday (lunch, dinner) and that accumulates to more than $116.  Today I will not poo-poo myself mentally.  I will embrace what I bought and be happy with it.


I had a therapy session with Laura and did cry several times, especially when discussing my relationship or interesting friendship with X (real name will not be disclosed, as many times things like this come back to bite you in the rear).  Overall the session was about men in general and how I have to see them differently than I do with women.  I think I want to be in a relationship, not to just have it, but to be a better person.  Is that a vain thing?  Does that show I am not strong enough to be "alone".  I'm not lonely: I have friends and family whom I love dearly.  I enjoy their company.  However, I think my soul longs for someone on earth who can demonstrate God's love for all of us.  At the same time, I know God alone suffices, but if He didn't want us to be with anyone on earth, He would have made a mark on our hearts for the singleton life.  


There are days where I am so glad I'm not in a relationship and happy to be by myself.  Most of all I feel like that - it's not a bad thing whatsoever.  Who knows what the future holds.  I know I go around and around in my head about relationships and being with a man.  


This is the kind of guy I want: a man who will listen, who is smart and funny, intelligent, loves music and singalongs, likes the silence, faithful, goes to Mass, loves the Church, pro-life, socially conservative, loves family and understands that my parents and brother live with me and if I would, I'd totally make my grandfather live with me (actually, I prefer if he chose to live with me because making someone live with you is a total bummer).  I would love if this man who wanted to be with me as much as I wanted to be with him liked to travel, and most of all, besides his intelligence, love of books, and being a faithful Catholic, he must be calm.  I have enough drama in my life that I prefer him to know that life happens and to go with the flow.  He must see the good in every situation and be empathetic and understanding.  


The world laughs and says that guys only want girls if they're naked.  I should not listen to the world.  That would only sadden me.  Dear God, help me to become ready for a relationship that will allow me to be authentic and not wear the mask of 1000 faces.


Humble Opinion of the Day: The humble person has an accurate view of herself. She can acknowledge her mistakes. She has low self-focus. She is aware of her place in the grand scheme of things and is sensitive to larger and possibly higher forces. - NYTimes